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If You Can’t Say No, Then Your Yeses hold absolutely zero meaning.
Being able to say “yes” holds monumental value. However, the value of your “yes” is only meaningful when it is balanced with the ability to say “no.” -T
It is easy to imagine that agreeing to every request, every opportunity or every expectation might make you more likable, agreeable, or even successful.
However, constantly saying “yes” without insight leads to personal erosion because you are eroding your time, energy, identity, and values.
What do I mean by that?
At its core, the concept of saying “no” is about boundaries. Boundaries define who we are and what we stand for.
If we don’t set boundaries by occasionally rejecting requests, we risk becoming a hollow reflection of the demands and desires of others, rather than the architects of our own lives.
Saying “no” is not about egoism but about self-respect if you truly don’t want to do the thing someone is asking you to do.
However, if it’s a request that doesn’t go against your boundaries, then, do it (if you actually want to).
People pleasers usually respond with a “yes” to make someone else happy, but does it make you happy?
Knowing what you would agree upon and not builds a part of your self-identity.
So, don’t lose it to make someone else pleased. Saying “yes” to every request you stumble upon also takes time to follow. Moreover, take your 24 hours of the day to focus on more meaningful things to do.
By meaningful, I mean tasks that will help you in the future, and not someone else. It is about making space for what truly matters.
Don’t get me wrong!
Now, I don’t mean that it is useless to help other people out. In fact, it is a great thing.
However, ask yourself these questions before saying yes to a request:
- Does this thing deteriorate my self-respect?
- Do I actually want to say yes?
- Will saying yes help the person in need massively, or will it just take a chunk of my valuable time?
